I Laugh to Keep From Crying

I often get told about how brave I am, how strong I am, how well I handled the cancer, surgeries, chemo, and now life after it all. The truth is – I haven’t handled it well at all. I just don’t let that side show; I smile often even when I want to frown. I … Continue reading I Laugh to Keep From Crying

Even Strong People Are Weak

Everyday continues to be a struggle. I have fabulous days – on these days I feel like I can conquer the universe. Other times, I just can’t seem to get it together. I can’t focus, I am sad, mad, and self-deprecating. It feels like the fabulous days are so few and far between any more. … Continue reading Even Strong People Are Weak

I Didn’t Sign Up For All of This

Now that I have completed my chemo and my cancer is in remission, I am doing my best to pick up the pieces and get on with my life … but every time I do, I get a stark reminder that I am not the same. I can’t just jump in and do things like … Continue reading I Didn’t Sign Up For All of This

Feeling Pretty Bummed Out These Days

Christmas is only a few days away and I’m doing my best not to feel so bummed out. I know that I survived cancer, trust me, I count my blessings every day. But I am having a hard time coping with “life after cancer (and chemo).” Not many people rallied around me when I was … Continue reading Feeling Pretty Bummed Out These Days

I Was Mad at God

Even though it was almost a year ago, I remember it like it was yesterday … I had just come home to Maryland from a nice two-week vacation visiting my family and friends in Kansas for the holidays and I was ready to get back to my crazy busy life. It was January so that … Continue reading I Was Mad at God